Speaking of the reality for transgender people in terms of dating…

How can transgender people adopt to modern dating world? It is already hard to find a date as a queer. When gender identity is added to the whole process, dating seems almost impossible. Nowadays, internet and online dating apps have become the shelter for LGBT community, but for transgender people, it is not always easy and safe to go online.

Most of my friends and me are using LGBT dating apps to know people, hookup and date. Many online dating and hookup apps claim themselves to be LGBT-friendly. It might be true, but the inclusiveness for LGBTQ group is far stronger than that for transgender people. I heard a lot of talk about “I would never date a transgender”. As a matter of fact, there is only 16%-18% Americans would date transgender people. It’s not hard to believe the number, given by the number of news about transgender violence and suicide rate. Most people are either afraid of transgender people or unwilling to date them, which constitute the major reason why it is so difficult for transgender people to find a date. Although I have get used to the fact, it still feels tough to deal with.

I viewed several most popular dating apps and sites to see which are the most inclusive ones. Most people insist in gender binary, saying you are either male or female. There is no other option. Some dating apps are more inclined to homosexual people other than bisexual, because they only allow users to choose one gender they are interested in, instead of both, while some have multiple choice vary from straight, bisexual to transgender, etc. Among all the general dating apps, tinder is the most inclusive one. However, if you want the easiest, you can always choose a transgender dating app such as Transdr, that is a lgbt dating app specially designed for transgender people and their allies. Find transgender love.

Even though some dating apps have clearly stated there is an option for transgender people, some of them still feel they are obligated to share their gender identity clearly in their personal profile. However, in most circumstances, when you tell your partner that you are a transgender, they would treat you differently in opinion. If you don’t, they would think you are a cheater when they find out. There are only two types of people in the eyes of transgender people: the people who support them and the people who hate them. To be honest, their choices are really limited.

Some transgender people prefer to share the truth about them when they start dating. The reason why they do this is that they don’t want to be violated when they really meet in person. In many cases, when I date, I forget my gender identity until when it gets serious and they end it with some rude words when the truth come out to them. Sometimes, I would be ghosted when I tell them I am a transgender. Although it’s very disappointing to be cut out, it’s safer this way from long term. Don't call them shemales.

Several things to know before you getting serious with a trans guy

There are no exact same two leaves in the world. So are for transgender people. Just like any other person, transgender guys are from different background. Their gender identity and sexual orientation might change in a certain stage of their lives. They have needs in sexual, social and other aspects. It might be different from those cisgender guys you have dated. Therefore, before your relationship getting serious, you should know more information about how to date transgender guys. Here are several things you should know. Find lgbt dating here.

You might be influenced by people’s perspective on you dating a transgender person. Some people might think you are lesbian, while some might think you are heterosexual. Your family and friends might make assumption to your sexual orientation because of the gender identity of your partner. This is unfair and unreal, but you must learn how to deal with such intolerance.

If your partner’s gender identity changes during your relationship, then you might be confused with your gender identity as well as his. No matter what, many people, even yourself, still are not properly educated with the right and relative knowledge. Are you ready to educate yourself and other people that are going to question you and judge you?

Transition might bring damage both physically and mentally. Many transgender people lost the connection and support from their family and friends when they choose to come out of the closet. Even though transgender guys usually don’t have such severe violence compared to transgender women, they still face many dangers and risks. Find transgender hookup here.

Transgender guys face the social pressure brought by their manhood. They try to be recognized as a real man. Many of them suffer from violence from family and outside. If your man experienced damages during their transition, you need to be there for him during the whole time. Different forms of pressure from society is inflicted on transgender people. A study shows that over 46% of transgender guys have tried to kill themselves. The data is quite terrifying.

Is he ready to make out with you? When you are dating a transgender person, the most important thing is to figure out what would make them anxious and what is not going to. Every transgender person has their own language to describe their body parts. Try to be open and respectful with the way he is used to doing with his body parts. He might want to be touched in a certain way. Use some words that would show your recognition for his gender identity. Be sympathetic. Help him regain confidence.

If he chooses to have surgery, respect his decision. Even if you accept his body doesn’t mean he accepts it. If your partner decide to make some changes, you should support him.

Even if you are going out with a heterosexual guy, remember, anyone could discover a new side of their gender identification. Some transgender guys are wavering between neutral pronouns and masculine ones. Just let it go and respect him. Here is the best ts dating app.

How to interact with transgender women: Tips on languages

Do we need to reach an agreement before words getting offensive? Words can be silent killer, especially the pronouns that are used on transgender people and non-binaries. Ignoring the perspective of others toward you can actually drift them apart. Sometimes even cause physical damage. The misuse of pronouns seems to be innocent and innocuous, but it puts the speakers’ value in front of others. That is to say, this is a kind of discrimination. It is harmful to predict other’s pronouns by guessing and observation. Find the best lgbt dating app here.

Do not use terms and phrases that they do not agree. For example, words like “this is just a phase” can have damaging power which means doubt, fantasy and ignorant.

Describing someone as “the former” or “biological human” is humiliating. When you insist in using the name which they no longer use, it means you choose your own comfort over others’. If you do it intentionally, it is completely rude and arrogant. Common languages shouldn’t be used to insult others. Why not use those words that are inclusive and respectful?

What is gender? Gender and s*x are two different things. Gender refers to one’s biological function including hormone, genitals and others. If you take some notice, gender is not binary as well. Gender is a recognition of male, female, both or neither. It also contains the role and expectations of the society towards people based on the male features or female features. These expectations can be so deep-rooted that we don’t even know how and when they are strengthened. Find ts dating here.

Gender evolved with time and culture. There was a time when female wearing pants was unacceptable. Now many people look back and wonder why such custom existed for so long. Just like the space we created for female clothes and dressing styles, we are learning more and allowing more space for the creation of language to be more inclusive and lenient.

Watch the word you are using and prevent confusion. With such minor words, the function of pronouns for identification recognition is significant. He, she and they. These are not grammar issues, but human rights.

If you meet a new friend and you are not sure which pronouns to use, ask first. In a society, the more we do, the more natural it will be. For example, just like asking “how are you”, asking which pronouns to use can be as common and spontaneous as greeting each other. With a simple question “Hi, Jay, how would you like to be addressed?” or “which pronouns I should use to address you?” you can totally have the answer you want without being disrespectful.

Therefore, regardless of he, she, they or some other pronouns, when you are told the right pronouns to address people, respect them and use these words that will make them feel happy and comfortable. Using the wrong pronouns is not only an arrogant behavior, it is also ignorant and against human rights. If you do it deliberately, then it can be considered as harassment. This is the right way to find transgender hookup.

How to interact with transgender people?

Respect their identity. Do not use their birth name. Unfortunately, some transgender people are still called by their birth name, even though they have changed it and made it public. This is not a rare circumstance. Calling them by their birth name can be considered as a behavior of disrespect. Just simply ask “how would you like to be called?” You can prevent awkward situations. Find LGBT dating here.

Many transgender people put a lot of energy, time and emotion to choose a new name, which should be respected. Using any name other than the one they recognize is harmful. We should all prevent that.

The gender history and experience of a transgender person is complicated and even heart-breaking to talk about. Therefore, when you are talking to a transgender person, try not to focus on satisfying your curiosity. Concentrate on the subject of your meeting.

Try to control your curiosity. Curiosity is a normal feeling, but you should not be controlled by it. This is also one of the reasons why many transgender people are disrespected. Even though you are interested in one’s gender, body structure and mind, please do know that they are not obligated to feed your curiosity and you don’t have the right to dig the information from them, just like you don’t have to explain your past and neither do they.

When you meet most people, you might not ask questions about their genitals or the medical treatment for them. This healthy information is completely personal and private. Do not deprive of their privacy rights. If you want to know more about their experiences, you can do some research by yourself and see what choices are there for people who recognize themselves as transgender or non-binaries. But do not ask a specific transgender person, unless you are allowed.

Pay attention to gender inclusive languages. Gender inclusiveness means to hole an open attitude for all gender identification. For example, we might read an article says “women”, while it actually means people who can bear a child. For transgender men, having period and the ability to be pregnant are still very realistic problems. If you simply say “women”, what about those people who recognize as transgender men, the so called "shemales", while still have uterus and other features related.

Do not use words such as “real women”, “regular women” or “normal women” to compare transgender women with cisgender women. There is no difference between these people. If you use these words, it means you still don’t accept and recognize their identity.

Think twice before you make a move. Remember, you are talking about a human-being. Before you open your mouth, think about which details are not necessary, weaken humanization or words that might make people feel uncomfortable. For example, you must admit that he/she is a human. Calling them transgender is a behavior of disavowal of their human rights. They are human first. Being a transgender is only a part of their identity. Call them transgender people is better than calling them transgender. Also, even if someone accept certain words, that does not mean all of them also accept it. You cannot make random assumptions. Here is the best transgender hookup app.

What is “shemales”? Confession from one of them

Except from homosexual and bisexual, now it is very common to meet transgender people and have a ts dating. Even though they are more frequent than ever to show up in our society, not all people can tell exactly what is lesbian and what is real transgender people. However, we are not going to tell you what does “shemales” means and we are not going to throw you a definition. We found a girl with d*ck to tell you her experience of becoming a transgender person. Here is the personal experience of Jessie on how she turned from a guy to a girl.

I am the typical example for the so-called “ladyboy”. Although I am not a big fan of this word, it surly describes people like me very accurately. I was born as a boy and raised up like one as well. However, I can say that there was never a day I felt right about myself. I prefer to hang out with female friends instead of male counterparts. I think being with girls are more comfortable with being with guys. I envy my female friends for their pretty dresses and appearance, while when I was with my male friends, I always try to be as masculine as possible in order to be seemed normal in their eyes.

Until I was graduated from college, I finally decided to do something that might make myself uncomfortable for the rest of my life. I was born in the wrong body, but it won’t stop me from being the way I want to. So I started my hormone therapy, in order to be prepared for the significant gender reassignment surgery.

My breasts get bigger. My face and hands become more feminine. I feel more like a female instead of a male. However, I still have my male genital. I planned to make the complete transition from male to female. However, after one night, I decided to make a little compromise.

As all transgender people should know, gender reassignment surgery is very expensive, so I decided to save for a couple of years to be able to afford the expense. During the process, I went to a party. We drank a lot and smoked some drugs, which makes everyone more relaxed than usual. I saw a cute guy. We chatted for a while and then we decided to go out and find some place dark and more private. We started to make out passionately and he started take off my clothes and so I did the same to him. I only had my panties on while he was naked. I told him that he could go from my anus and I prefer that way. He agreed. He took off my pants and did it. Astonishingly he touched my private parts and that was when he realized that I had a penis. He stopped for several seconds and still finished it.

This experience tells me that I would still surprise men in bed. That’s how I decided not to cut off my male genitals. On the contrary, I am going to be a woman, a happy woman.

Transgender and transsexual people: What is the difference between them?

TS dating has become an interesting way of dating, which are more and more welcomed these years. The more interested people are to it, the more questions need to be answered. First of all, let’s be clear with the difference between transsexual and transgender before talking about the various sexual preferences, hoping that transsexual dating will become more and more common.

What is transsexual people? Although transsexual and transgender can replace each other sometimes, they are actually two different things, because s*x and gender are different. The frontier one refers to one’s genitals and the form it is used. While gender refers to the social recognition that is accepted by society, that is male and female. Transsexual people are not happy with their body. This usually takes a whole transition procedure, that is, gender reassignment surgeries. The gender they are born to be are in contradictory with the gender they psychologically recognize themselves to be. To live peace with themselves, they need to change their gender.

What is transgender people? Transgender people will not change their physical gender, that is the one they are born to be, but the dressing style and behavior are in accordance with the gender they feel comfortable with. They choose to keep their natural genitals, but live in their opposite gender. For example, some males dress like females, wear makeups, keep long hair. Or a female wear male clothes with short hair. Some might be going through gender dysphoria during the process. Thus, some of them choose to make the complete transition to be the gender they feel comfortable with both psychologically and physically, while some choose to publicly live in the way they want without getting rid of their genitals. No matter what, their gender identification cannot decide their sexual orientation. This is another completely unrelated field to talk about.

What is the orientation for transgender and transsexual people? If you are interested in lgbt dating, you need to know that not all of them have unitary sexual orientation. More importantly, some of them prefer to leave gender aside when they are looking for partners. That is to say, some of them do not have certain preferred gender. They are more inclined to the personalities of the person. Gender might not be their top concern. For example, they might choose partner according to their likes and dislikes, similar interest, experiences, characteristics, etc. Before you date a ladyboy person, you should know that every transgender person is different. They have their own position for their gender identification and sexual orientation. They might not be in comply with the norm you get used to. Unless they clearly state their gender identity and sexual preferences, you should better ask them first with respect. Otherwise you might be wasting your time. If you are hoping to be treated with honest and respect, remember you should do the same to them first.